After talking to one of my best friends back home, the third wave of homesickness since Saturday began to spread over me.  You can see how I feel about this particular subject in my previous post.

I was tired of being at work so I took back some bad shirts I purchased to Target.  Obviously through red eyes and a runny nose I was totally disinterested in shopping more.  And since I have been really trying to eat less calories and work out more, I didn’t want to give into the temptation of eating something delicious to make me feel better.   I swept through Ross after that with the sickness easing up a bit and happened to walk by  Moxie Java.  I remembered I had a gift card that I hadn’t used so I thought I would check it out.  The girl actually helped me pick out something without coffee.  Like I knew what I was doing!  I wanted something cold to compliment the beautiful warm weather outside.  I chose a Vanilla Frappe with strawberry flavoring.  It was soooooo delicious!  And it DID make me feel that much better!  I am not saying that emotional eating is the cure…if for sure isn’t.  But this was a guilt free, imitation for a milkshake that didn’t cost me anything.  Thank you Moxie Java!

I think this feeling is one of the hardest we all have to face.  Its hard b/c for one, once you have it, nothing can actually make it go away completely.  You don’t think about it 98% of the time but the other 2% is miserable b/c you know there is nothing that can make you feel better.  Its no ones fault, not even your own if you choose to move away, its just something we all have to feel and understand to appreciate home and people and things that we love.

This weekend was particularly hard.  My family decided to go to the temple on the same day in the three different time zones we live in.  This was a great experience except that it made me miss them all very much, something I try to not let happen very often.  I even choked up on Sun. when bearing my testimony (I try to NEVER do that).

No one, not even your husband, can really take this feeling away from you.  Its hard too b/c I know in the past, newly married, and experiencing great homesickness, that I have actually hurt my spouse.  Being so sad that I am not around others makes him feel that I would rather be around them than him.  I can see how that can hurt someone.  So, I try to not make my sadness known in the really hard times.  Which is almost impossible for me b/c I wear all emotions on my sleeve.

Anyway, I feel so much better now, but I know that those feelings come and go powerfully.  If any of you are homesick, I empathize with you.  Lets have lunch!